Busyness + Trust

 

 Thursday, 20 May 2010

Been a busy week. Assignments. Tests. Well all the busyness of a college life.

Well some how its a good thing to be busy. We don't get to think a lot of stuff, and get stressed.

Well its a person's point of view.. Well in my case, being busy and responsible is a good thing. 

Being trusted, and busy for something important, I just feel, proud..

So I decided to look for a part time job. Even though I know everyone says that I'm already too busy..

But I just need to be more busy, well its better than staying at home doing nothing, getting scolded and missing my love and thinking all the stuffs that is not important.  

xoxo~ lonelyGirl

Life is crazy, and its just like a wheel

Sunday, 16 May 2010

Life is crazy.. Its just like a wheel, you have up and downs, and we never gonna always stay on the top.. some how its just crazy to be feeling a bad mood and suddenly feeling a good mood.  when our marks at school are on the top and suddenly rank last, or when our progress at work are extremely good and suddenly there is too much work.. we don't get to be always at the top in any kind of situation..

Sometimes when you hate someone you really feel like killing them or at least scold them.. but you can't..

when they are our family, we just can't.. when we know that they are someone you spend your life with you can't.. when they are someone who can't be hurt, you just can't......

xoxo~ lonelyGirl

Its complicated...

Saturday, 15 May 2010

Never thought loving someone could be this hard, I call it complicated.. but I love you, I really do.. in fact a lot. you are someone in my life who I don't want to lose and who I want to spend my life with. but its just complicated.. all the fights, all the not-so-trusting thing, and of course jealousy..

whether its jealousy towards you or my ex.. well its just complicated. well don't you ever feel like this sometimes? when you saw your ex who you was in love with before and he is now loving someone else and seeing those photos on facebook? awkward huh? and then your boyfriend tells you that he is going to dinner and movies with a girl you doesn't know? its jealousy.. both are.. but its just not right..

today I'm back to my normal days with my babe.. back to dating my lappy and blackberry again, like always.. well lets see how far this could go.. I could use some patience here.

xoxo~ lonelyGirl

My first post

Friday, May 14

I really think I love my boy too much.. but does he?

Today I saw my ex making a blog for his girlfriend again..and I got this feeling again, jealous.. because he didn't even is like that when he is with me..

while with him? he is someone who doesn't know romance even love! he is even worse.

now he learned how to say i love you.. i really do wanna marry him..

my ex? he didn't even say i love you once! i can even count how many times he said it, and i should even force him to say that..but he really do know what romantic is.. you don't need to give me flowers, but you can give me bears. you don't need to say i love you, but you can give me attention... I know he loves me so much and really do cares about me, but.. why do i always feel he is not paying much attention to me? or he is just not the person? I'm really getting sick of this long distance relationship. I really doubt that it can stay long.. but i really do want to spend the rest of my life with him.. but why do i sometimes not believe in him, and sometimes feeling unsecure.. what's happening to me? where have all the trust gone? i really wanna make things work with us babe..

today you was too busy that you didn't even search for me.. you say you was in a meeting so i didn't disturb, i waited till 12, and there is still no sign of you.. sometimes i really feel to ignore you, but why can't i? i am always the one calling and searching for you for every 2 hours.

what happening to the tough me? i really hate love! So I finally message him again, and guess what did he say...

like always, he said sorry.. shit. that's what i wanna hear! but,, that's just not enough! he say he was busy cleaning his room.. i asked him why didn't he tell me, he say that he need to do a lot of things.. who knows man! r u kissing someone right now or something like that! I really don't know what to do.. days by days passed, you changed, and my trust sallow.....